....... WOW......

As the title so adeptly states....... WOW...... Its been a while. I mean, its been a few months since ive even thought about going on this site. WOH WOH WEE WOH, everything has changed...... Not really.
It was interesting to reread some entries from months long past. I sounded..... Kinda Whiny. But I know i had at least a half decent reason.
I wont lie, the reason for my absence was well...... I just didnt want to do it anymore. I thought perhaps if i just rid myself of any ties to the world of emotional instability, it would bring about that change i hoped for. I just thought "Heck, i dont need this to feel better, I'm the one that will make myself feel better, so i need to get out and do it." Which until that point had seemed like a hopeless cause.
Now the reason for the changed in mindset actually came partially from the viewers of this blog ( Which i cant thank you enough for listening to my disheartening ramblings, if anyone still remembers this exists hah), as well as a good friend. Now this friend is the older brother of my main man, my bread and butter as it were (best friend). Now this guy has done it all, he's traveled all over, worked all sorts of intriguing jobs, and quite letter had sex with more women than i have friends (that sounds unimpressive, so we'll say ALOT of women).
But this guy isnt a playa, or a sex crazed asshole, he's a devoted family man who kind to everyone, and tries to help people wherever he goes. He's a very awesome dude in general. Now i finally got the courage to tell this guy about my predicament, and how frustrated i was that i still got terrible pangs of sadness. So he told me that i was depending to much on other people to make me happy. He said that yes, other people can try to make you happy, or can complete you, but only YOU can make yourself happy. And that doesn't mean just being loner. YOU need to accept the help of others and apply it to your life, you cant just ride on them, hoping it'll make you happier. Now im doing him an injustice be repeating all this in the way im doing it, but the way he said it... There was just something that CLICKED. And i decided to use that mindset in my life from that point on. And its helped, im become gradually happier with each day that passes. Some other stuff happened.. but im falling asleep at the keyboard, so ill save it. Have a good one.